8 months

Once again, I am super way behind on posting to this little blog. At least he hasn't turned 9 months yet, so I am not too far behind. LOL

Once again, another month has snuck up on me. I can not fathom that we are nearing the holiday season. I also can not fathom that I have a baby boy sleeping in the next room who will be helping us celebrate these holidays. So many Thanksgiving's and Christmas’s have gone by in years past that I dreamt of having a baby to share them with. It’s all going by way too fast though. I just want to freeze frame these days. He is getting more and more fun and it’s getting harder to be away from him. It’s hard to leave for work now because he cries as I walk out the door. I wish I could hold his snuggly little body next to mine all day and never have to leave him. He’s always sweet but in the mornings he is particularly sweet with his messy hair, sleepy eyes and laid back personality. We have our little morning routine and I think I enjoy it as much as he does. When he wakes, anywhere between 6 -7am he is usually crying to let us know he has had enough and wants out of his crib! He cries through his quick diaper change but it’s a necessary evil because the sopping thing is usually on the verge of exploding and has to weigh 5lbs! We then walk into the living room to our favorite chair with a bottle and blanket in hand. He laughs and squeals at the TV in anticipation of what he knows is coming on the screen. Barney is the major part of his morning routine. That’s right folks, my little man is absolutely hooked on Barney! He stays enthralled from the first little intro music until the “I love you” song in the end. Once the show has started (Thank goodness for Netflix with Barney readily available!) he lays his head against my arm and lazily drinks his bottle. I love this time before the rush of getting ready for school and work even if I do go to work with Barney songs in my head.

This month has proven to be another one of growth and development. He has modified his crawling again, it’s looks like a wounded warrior crawl, one leg up so his foot is flat on floor, and the other leg bent so his knee is touching. Sometimes, he is on all fours and sometimes he just hops on his padded bottom to get where he is going. It is so funny! He has no problems getting to where he wants to go and usually makes quick work of it! He is also pulling up on anything he can get a hold of, couch, chair, and your legs. We had to lower the mattress in the crib because he was pulling up and looking over the top with a sly little look in his eye. I think he was plotting his escape. We foiled his plans, for now. He also has 2 of the prettiest little bottom teeth you have ever seen! (Yes, insert biased opinion). But they are cute, really. His first tooth popped through on Jeff’s birthday, the 16^th of October with the 2^nd coming just 5 days later. He did get a runny nose and ended up getting a cold and his first ear infection. Of course, the doc said it was not related to teething but so many Moms have told me otherwise. I’m just grateful he is feeling much better! That was a rough couple of sad, cranky days. And Caleb was pretty cranku, almost as cranky as me!  Halloween fell right in the middle of his sickness so we opted not to take him out. I did dress him up as a little lion and took some pictures but Grandma stayed home with him and we took Amber to the Trunk or Treat at church.

Caleb continues to eat like a champ and wants anything and everything he sees! If you are holding him while eating he goes right for your plate so you better be careful if you don’t want him to have it! He stole hash browns off of Grandma’s plate at IHOP a couple of weeks ago. He was in the highchair but his little fingers were long enough and fast enough to snatch food off her plate and cram it in his mouth before anything could be done. Really, it was that fast! He also enjoyed a tiny bit of my pancakes, but that was my own doing. And he loved it. Mostly he just sticks to baby food - he loves it! He is even enjoying the green stuff as long as we mix it with something more enjoyable, like peaches. I have an aversion to baby food meat in a jar – ugh it looks and smells like wet cat food!! Caleb is not so sure he likes it either. He continues to wolf down the puffs and mum mums with a passion. Now that he has a couple of teeth you can hear him crunch down and it is precious.

 

We also celebrated my brother Kevin's wedding to Laura. It was a beautiful wedding and I'm pretty sure a great time was had by all! Amber was a junior bridesmaid and she looked so pretty, and grown! :( Laura was radiant and Kevin was as handsome as ever. Caleb looked quite dapper in a plaid button up shirt and black cord pants. At the reception he changed into a tuxedo onesie, he was ready to party! LOL It really was a wonderful time, I know they will make each other happy for a very long time.

 

Well, I'm gonna close this for now because in a couple of weeks it will be time to write the 9mo post.

 

We love you baby boy and am so very thankful that we can call you ours!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

This one's for you Dad.

10 years. 120 months. 520 weeks. 3650 days. 87600 hours. And I could go on and on. Nearly a 1/3 of my life has been spent without him in my life. I have a hard time fathoming that fact. How did ten years pass by so quickly? How did we make it a decade without him. I do believe the days get easier, but only because the heart, mind, and soul can not possibly survive in the initial place of despair forever. 10 years ago I was living in my little bubble. Our family as a whole had suffered loss, but it had been a few years and things were good. Dad had cut back on his side jobs and was able to spend more time doing things he enjoyed. He had recently lost weight and was feeling great. I know without a doubt the Summer before he died was a special gift from God. He gave us that gift so we would have recent, amazing memories of impromptu fishing trips where he didn't care if he personally caught a thing as long as we were having fun, a special trip to the Asheboro Zoo just cause his baby girl wanted to extend the weekend of Aunt Grace's 100th birthday, celebrating with the Rosage's at their anniversary party, celebrating our Church's 100th anniversary, tossing the softball in the yard and him pretending that my pitches burned his hand.

I only have one regret. Even though I was 22 years old, I wish I had the foresight to ask questions. About his childhood, favorite things, opinions on major topics, his dreams for me, his landscaping ideas, and the list goes on and on and grows daily.

In the past 10 years, I built a house in the field next to their house, also known as "Over the Mill" I got divorced. And in hindsight, he would have been ok with that. He would have worried, but he would have my back all the way.

I met Jeff, tasted true love, got married, gained a beautiful daughter, became a mother. Kevin finished college, began a career that he is passionate about, met a beautiful woman and he too, tasted true love. Dad would be beyond pleased.

I fought through a decade of infertility, he would understand that as well having fought along side Mom for years. Jeff and I began our adoption journey and were blessed beyond measure by Caleb Alexander. Dad would be captivated by his grandchildren. He would be gentle and playful. Perhaps standoffish at first, but he would be their biggest fan, and they would be his. I tell them both of him, and how he would have loved them, how he watched over them. Amber knows she will be able to meet him one day.

 Lots of big life changes in the last ten months, he really should have been here to witness them first hand. But who knows, I might have been to afraid to divorce when I did, afraid to disappoint, which would mean I wouldn't have Jeff, or Amber, or Caleb. Kevin may not have been driven to finish college, which would mean there would be no Laura. His accident could have been God's way of sparing him from being riddled with cancer. He was the only one of his siblings that had not been attacked by this disease, and I don't believe he would have been a good patient. Whatever the reason, it happened. And I believe it helps me to relate to others, be empathetic and understanding, and I am able to use my personal experience to help others in my daily job. I think that would make Dad proud.

I still meet people that knew him directly or indirectly, all have wonderful things to say of him. I think that is an amazing testament to a person. That after all this time, people still talk of his kindness and generosity to others, as well as his knowledge and expertise. I would love to hear him and Jeff talk - two fellow hockyologists.

I wish that he was still here. I wish Mom still had her best friend, her other half. I wish she could find someone to spend time with, not a replacement, just someone to make her feel special and beautiful. A companion. I think Dad would be ok with that too. He would want her to be happy even without him. Caleb has done amazing wonders for her spirit and I am grateful for that. But still.

Dad's life and death has made me who I am today. And I am ok with that.

7 months old!

Caleb actually turned 7 months old 10 days ago, but just now getting a chance to write this post. Had to finish the Texas series of posts before I forgot everything, so here ya go. And, I haven't downloaded this month's pics yet, so I will have to go back and edit this post later with super cute pics. But in the mean time.....

This has been a BIG month in Caleb's life! He has really developed in the last couple of weeks! While in TX, he really tried to start crawling and in about 2 days after being home, he was OFF! Crawling from one end of the house to the other. Well, it kinda looks like a modified Army crawl, but it works for him. My fave is when I open the front door after work and he sees me. He immediately starts squealing and kicking, and rushing to the door to get to me. If he happens to be holding a toy, he doesn't waste time to put it down, he just keeps it in his hand and bangs the floor with it all the way over to me. It's quite the welcome home. He has also been AMAZING in the sleep department! Not only is he continuing to fall asleep easily at night, but he has been sleeping ALL NIGHT LONG! That's right, it has finally happened consistently! Praise the Lord! Such a sweet, happy, easy going fella. If we never have the opportunity to adopt again, I can rest easy knowing that God has already given us the sweetest, happiest, calmest baby boy. What an amazing blessing he is. I am completely and totally in love with him. And I'm certain people are tired of hearing me talk about him, but all I can suggest is  - you might wanna get some earplugs. LOL

Buddy boy LOVES eating, crawling, making funny faces and sounds, working his eyebrows, transferring items from hand to hand, puffs, dehydrated yogurt bites, self feeding of the puffs and yogurt bites, his sissy, Daddy, grandparents, church, watching kitty on the porch, waking up in the morning, his bottle, mirrors, baths, kisses, my rubber cellphone case, and is currently obsessed with Barney!

He is currently 17lbs 6oz - that's a big growth for this month! Wearing size 3 diapers, 6mo clothes (although he can still wear some 3/6mo), eating between 7/8 ounces every 3/4 hours and eating solids 2x a day.

In the last 2 days we have had another big development! After months and months we have finally spotted 2 teeth!!!!! They  are not quite through yet, but we can see the little white peaks just under the gum so it won't be long!

Baby boy, you and sissy are my absolute joy. I'm sorry that I have to go to work everyday and can't be home with you, but you reward me when I come home and we make the most of our evenings together. There is nothing in the world that I wouldn't do for you. I want to protect you and keep you safe and secure forever. I thank God that we were chosen to be your parents. I've been sharing your adoption story with you since birth and one day we will be able to talk about it and answer your questions. I hope you will always know that you are loved beyond measure. That you are our miracle, the answer to our prayers. Happy 7mo baby boy, Momma loves you.

Texas Day 4

Day 4 of our Texas trip started with packing and a little light cleaning of our lovely rental house. Somehow things never seem to quite fit back in your suitcase the same way as previously packed. Packing for 2 kids was interesting to say the least. Babies sure do come with a lot of stuff! After we were all packed we headed downtown to meet D., she was going to be our tour guide for the afternoon before we had to catch our flight.

We found a parking garage and waiting a few minutes for her to arrive. I was already feeling sad about saying goodbye to Briana and Noel and was seriously not looking forward to having to say goodbye to D. We had so much history in just 11 short months. I tried to push that aside and make the most of the few hours we had left. We ventured out to find the Alamo. So many people had said that I would be disappointed with the Alamo but I personally thought it was pretty cool. I wish it had been a little less crowded so I could have read all of the little signs and plaques, but I think we got the gist of it. The building is still beautiful even after all these years. We took a self-guided tour, took a few pictures (outside), and headed to the gift shop for some souvenirs.

After the Alamo we continued walking downtown and made our way to the River Walk area. Very cool. Beautiful landscaping along winding bricked walkways on the water. I kept thinking that walk would have taken forever if Dad had been there. He would have wanted to inspect and then teach us about every plant and flower we passed. I wouldn’t have minded though, that would have been time well spent.

We bought tickets for the water taxi tour and we really enjoyed it! Of course, my camera decided to die at that time, so I took zero pictures, but take my word for it, it was really enjoyable. Next we walked a few blocks to the Rainforest Café – a really interesting place for lunch. It is decorated like a huge jungle complete with animatronics and “thunder storms” that come up every 20 minutes. I think it was a little loud for my father in law, but the rest of us enjoyed it. Even Caleb thought the giant gorilla near our table was fun.J

We were quickly running out of time so after lunch we headed back to the garage. And again, we were faced with having to say goodbye. I really didn’t want too. Because, just with Briana, I didn’t know how long it would be before we could see each other again. We hugged, a few times, and promised to keep in touch. My sweet D. means so much to us. We just adore her and her sweet spirit. I wish I could protect her from all the negativity and the things that she is facing. I can’t wait until we can visit again, or maybe next time her and T will come to see us!!

We turned in our cars at the drop-off location and took a shuttle to the airport. I had looked at the tickets and informed everyone we had plenty of time because our flight did not leave until 5:50pm, and it was currently just a little after 4pm. Ummmm, not sure where I got that info from because after we all used the restrooms, and made our way to print our boarding passes and check our luggage I looked again at the times. We were leaving at 4:50 not 5:50!!!!!!!!!!!! OH MY Goodness!!!!!! We rushed through security – thank God we had the baby and stroller cause we always got to go through a special line, and then we all rushed to our gate. I almost blew that whole situation and we would have missed our flight! Thankfully, we made it with a few minutes to spare and loaded the plane with no more problems!

Caleb did great on the flight again and just drank his bottle and took a good long nap. We couldn’t have asked for a better flying companion. Amber enjoyed her window seat, especially when it got dark outside and she could see all the pretty lights.

We arrived in Charlotte, had dinner and were passing the time at our gate. It was getting really close to boarding when the attendant made an announcement that the flight from Charlotte to Jacksonville was boarding at E31……not the terminal we had been sitting at for an hour!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Ok, so this time it was not my fault!! Our boarding passes confirmed that where we were sitting was correct but the airport had changed the terminal and we had not heard the announcement. So there we were again, about 30 gates away from our boarding plane! We loaded our stuff and started hauling booty to our gate. Mom, Caleb, and I hitched a ride with a security guard so we wouldn’t have to run with the stroller and we made it just in the nick of time! We loaded the plane, strapped our belts and let out a collective sigh of relief.

The rest of the trip was uneventful, located our luggage, drove home, and passed out!!

We all had a wonderful, memorable time but we were all SO glad to be almost HOME!

Texas Day 3

I was so excited about Texas Day 3 cause it meant we were going to SEA WORLD! We all enjoyed our day in court, obviously that was the reason we were even there but I was super happy about going to SW. I have only been once, when I was 9 years old and I was really looking forward to it. It was pretty warm that day, in the low 90’s and although I wish it could have been a little cooler, we faired ok. D. had hooked us up with some discount tickets through her work (Thank you D.) which was most appreciated. We got there early so we would be there when they opened. We waited in line for the gates to open and then it was a mad dash to make it to the first show of the day. We made it just in time and thoroughly enjoyed the pre-show with the mime who ended up being one of the divers/acrobats. The beluga whales and dolphins were phenomenal. I had chills sitting in 90 degree weather. I wanted to cry it was so beautiful. How silly is that? Amber sat with her mouth opened the whole time while Caleb slept through the entire show.

We continued making our way through the park, fighting the still big crowd, and made it to all the shows. Jeff, Amber, and his Dad rode a few rides while Caleb enjoyed riding in his stroller. I ended up taking his little outfit off and he cruised the park in his diaper and hat under the shade of his stroller. He was pretty happy covered in slobber and crumbs from his new favorite snack the Mum Mum. (It’s like a rice cake for babies). Amber loved the kid section with the obstacle course and water area. Caleb even enjoyed standing on one of the little water spouts coming out of the cement (maybe 2 inches high). The water was really cold but he didn’t seem to mind on his little toes. I especially enjoyed looking at the penguins, although I could have easily spent much longer in there! Not only was it nice and cool but Amber and I had been watching the penguins on their webcam for over a month and I, for one, was completely smitten! They are just so darn cute waddling around.

We made it to all the shows and of course, Shamu did not disappoint! I am so grateful we were able to add this adventure to our Texas trip!

After everyone had seen everything they wanted to see and ridden all the rides it was time to leave. We made it to the car and blasted the cold air! Can you tell that it was hot that day??? And I heard several people say that they were so glad TX was having a “cold spell” Eek.

We headed back to the house to rest and relax and SHOWER and then before we knew it, it was time for dinner again. This being our last night we decided to head to one of Jeff and I’s fave from our last trip, Texas Pride BBQ! We made plans for Briana and Noel to meet us too. We filled our trays with beef brisket, ribs, beans, and potatoes and found a seat. It was so yummy. They put your meat on butcher paper and for some reason it makes it that much yummier to me. LOL We finished off our meal with warm peach cobbler, a la mode of course.

Leaving the restaurant we mingled in the parking lot for awhile not wanting to say goodbye. On our last trip the goodbyes were easy because we knew we would be back in 6mo to finalize. This time, we don’t know how long it will be before we make it back. We hope they come to NC for a visit sometime but with their little miracle on the way, their trip will have to be moved to the back burner. I forgot to mention on my last post, but Briana gave us the sweetest gift on our court day. It was the book “tell me again about the night I was born” which makes me want to cry my eyes out every time I read it. It is so sweet. And the most adorable onesie, 1^st Halloween for Caleb. But my most favorite thing of all was the special card that she gave us. Her kind words truly touched my heart. It’s amazing how God put us together to share the wait, the upsets, and the pure joy of adoption. They are such a blessing to us and I will never ever be able to truly put in to words how much their kindness over this past year has meant to us. I mean, seriously, how many people do you know that would invite you to stay in their home, with and without a newborn having just met them??? They personify God’s love for people. If you don’t have friends like them, pray that God will send special folks like them into your life.

I tried to thank them and say goodbye but I became a blubbering mess, so we just left it at “see ya later’. Got in our cars and headed back to the house. Of course, we had to stop at Wal-mart again……

Texas Day 2

Friday morning we awoke bright and early. Well, everyone else woke up, I was already awake. Buddy boy did not like sleeping in Texas! He had a hard time the whole weekend! I tried to keep his routine similar but it didn’t help. Different crib, different sounds, time change, whew – he and I struggled. But anywho…..

We all kind of lazed around for the morning because we didn’t really have time to go and do anything because it was COURT DAY! Whooo hooooo

When it was time we all showered and dressed and after making another stop at Walmart (Jeff forgot this belt) we were on our way to the court house. We managed to find a good parking spot directly across from the court house (miracle!) and proceeded to work our way through security. We actually passed with flying colors! Briana had offered to meet us at the court house to show us around and to take pictures and I am so glad she was able to do both! Finding the place on our own would have been a nightmare to say the least. Down the elevator, down the hall, up the elevator, eek. Once we got to the right area we were told to wait for our attorney, which again, I’m glad Briana was with us, because she knew what the woman looked like. As we waiting about 45 minutes for our attorney a sweet adoptive mom holding a precious little baby boy introduced herself to us. Her name was Lacey and her and her husband (and parents) were there to finalize the adoption of their son as well. I remember seeing their faces on the agency website so it was really cool to share that time with them. Their son Ryder was born on the 7^th of March, the day we received a call about Caleb. Shewas so sweet and actually surprised Briana and I by telling us that she follows both of our blogs. That was a nice surprise! (So if you are reading this Lacey – Hi and email me sometime or find me on FB so we can stay in touch!) After a little bit of waiting our attorney appeared and introduced herself. Waited a few more, filled out some papers, then it was time to head into the court room. We had heard that the judges set aside a day to handle all adoptions each week, that the Judges really enjoyed those days. Well, our judge was no exception. We even watched as he sent some folks to another courtroom so the he could focus on just the adoptions that were being finalized. Lacey and I were the only ones from our agency, but there were other families completing step-child adoption, foster adoptions, etc. The attorney asked if Jeff and I wanted our whole group to stand before the Judge and we definitely said yes. We had been through this whole process together so we were excited they were able to share in the moment, especially Amber. When it was out turn all 7 of us rose from our seats and made our way to the front of the courtroom to stand before the judge. Jeff and I were asked a few questions (which I don’t remember!!), asked if it was our intent to make Caleb’s name legal (yes), and if it was our intent to adopt him. (YES) Mom was standing to my right which was a good thing cause Caleb was most interested in my long necklace that he wanted to eat!! I quickly took it off and passed it to her to hide for me. When I glanced at her tears were streaming down her face. Happy tears. Healing tears. Having struggled with infertility for so many years, have 2 miracle children, and watched me struggle for a decade, she understands. Probably better than most. She knows what a special, priceless, miracle gift Caleb is to our family. And she rejoices in him. The judge finally said he saw no reason for us not to be approved for and make our adoption final – words to our ears! He then said we could take some pictures with him and he invited us ALL to stand with him while Briana snapped pictures. He said Caleb sure was a cute and happy fella and congratulated us all. Oh, what a special time. So thankful God gave us a sweet Judge to share our special time with.

After we left the courtroom we waited in the hall a bit longer for our attorney to give us a copy of our adoption decree – hallelujah! We then invited Briana to lunch and we headed to the Spaghetti Warehouse, a delicious, interestingly decorated Italian joint with fantastic food! We set the 2 little handsome boys next to each other and they had the best time “talking”,. Caleb tried a Mum Mum for the first time and he LOVED IT! He devoured it! His first attempt at self feeding was a success. He also liked the Puffs (AKA Baby Crack cause they are so popular)

After lunch we headed back to the house for a quick rest and clothing change, and then we were off to meet Briana to have family photos taken. We met at beautiful Brackenridge Park in our coordinating colors and Briana started snapping shots. I have seen a few of them already, and I am so so so happy with they way they have turned out! I couldn’t believe how well Caleb behaved; he smiled on que when she raised that camera! It was so funny. Amber looked beautiful and so grown.L I love the shots of her and Caleb together, they truly adore each other. I hope their love for each other continues to grow.

Once pics were finished we headed for a late dinner. Yes, we ate on this trip, a lot. We decided to try a steakhouse so we headed to a place called Salt Grass. Oh My Goodness. I even ordered a steak which is a rarity for me so you know I hoping it would be good. I was not disappointed! Everything was delicious! And we surprised Amber with a giant piece of cake and sang Happy Birthday to her (2 days early). She was surprised and a little embarrassed.

Whew, after a long and emotional day we all turned in pretty early excited to start our next day at SEA WORLD!

Texas Day One

Texas Day One – September 20^th, 2012

Day One of our adventure started really early! After staying up too late the night before with last minute packing, visitors, and nerves, 4:15am alarm seemed like it rang way too soon! Amber was sleeping on the couch because Jeff’s parents were staying in her room for the night. The alarm clock rang and we all sprang into action. We let buddy boy sleep as long as possible, much easier to haul our luggage around without taking turns passing the baby. Plus he had slept so good the night before we knew he would be starving when he woke up. Amber woke up with no problem; she was so excited to get the show on the road! She was nervous about flying too, but more excited than anything. We woke up little man, fed, changed, clean jammies, and loaded him in the car seat. He was all smiles of course. I wonder if he thought something was out of the ordinary. There usually are not so many people at the house scurrying around at 5am. We loaded the cars, picked up my Mom from her house next door, and headed to the airport. We had received an email the night before that our flight would be delayed about 40 minutes but they suggested still arriving on time in case they were able to move things along quicker.

 

All in all, I think we did pretty good getting through security – all seven of us. An infant, a nine year old, 5 adults – 2 non-flyers. We did fail security the first time through. My MIL had hair gel in her carry-on and apparently I was packing too much Desitin. A crime, I know. Well, my mother in law took the items and was going to backtrack to the ticket counter to see if we could put the items in our suitcase. When she came back she was trying to talk to me through the glass wall, well, I could not hear her so I opened the door, maybe 2 inches. You would have thought I had committed the biggest crime of the century! The security workers started yelling at me “You must go out the door! Once the door is open, you must go out!” Well I calmly told them that I had already gone through security, my id and boarding pass were with the other members of our party at our gate. Well, they didn’t care, they made me go through the door, only to wait at security for my mother in law to pass security (after we threw our liquids away cause the plane was already loaded), she then had to go dig out my boarding pass and ID and bring them back to me so I could proceed. It’s a good thing our airport is so very small, or it would have been an even bigger debacle. But, the good news is that we made it, and we were ready to board our first flight!!

 

It is only a 45 minute flight from our home to Charlotte, NC so once we got seated and leveled out good it was time to start our descent already. Amber loved flying! She thought it was pretty much the coolest thing ever! She had a window seat next to Jeff, Johnny & Debbie sat behind Mom and I, and Caleb sat with us as a lap baby. He was the PERFECT flying companion! Seriously, I could not have planned it any more perfect! He took a bottle on take-off, slept the entire flight, awoke when we landed. He actually did this on all four flights this weekend! Others on the plane commented that he was so quiet they didn’t even realize there was a baby on the account! That’s my boy!J

 

We landed in Charlotte and had over an hour to burn before our next flight to San Antonio. We grabbed some breakfast (breakfast burrito at Salsaritos!!), let Caleb stretch, and play on a blanket on the floor, and then it was about time to board. This was a 2.5 hour flight, all went well, but we all were ready for the plane to land! Except Caleb, cause he was still sleeping so good. We landed in beautiful San Antonio at 1pm (their time), and after locating our luggage went to the car rental counter where I had reserved our 2 vehicles. We ended up with 2 cars because all 7 of us and our luggage could not fit in one comfortably. We hopped on a tram that dropped us off at the car lot and we loaded our GPS with our next destination. Lunch…..at Bill Miller’s BBQ. Jeff and I had eaten there on our first trip in January and we had enjoyed it so much and were looking forward to it again. We didn’t waste any time.

After lunch we headed to our adoption agency to drop off our final 6mo report including pics and doc report on Caleb. We also wanted the family to meet the ladies at the agency, and of course they wanted to love on sweet baby Caleb. They scooped him up right away, although he gave them his little head drop/shy look. We stayed and talked for a few minutes and they said they would welcome us back when we were ready to adopt again. J

From there, we headed to find our rental house. We were very pleased with our house! It was a great, new neighborhood and the house was clean and beautifully decorated. It was spacious, nice and cool inside, and the furniture was very comfortable. I had communicated with the house owner beforehand and wouldn’t you know it, out of all the houses I researched, I chose the one whose owners were also adoptive parents! How cool is that? She was able to share our joy with first hand experience. Caleb loved the carpet and he is oh so close to crawling! I don’t think it will be long now. Eek.

We settled in to the house, unpacked and lounged for a bit then it was time to meet D. and her husband T. for dinner at the Alamo Café. Oh boy, that restaurant was great! They make their own tortillas and they were scrumptious. It was great to catch up with them, although the meal was over way too soon. We hugged each other so tightly, we had been through so much in the last 6 months. She looked fantastic! It was soooo good to hear her laugh!

 

 

After dinner I returned her baby blanket and bear from her childhood that she had given to us on our first visit this year. She had given them to us since she had chosen us to raise her child, it was to be a sweet gift for baby. But, since our story was written differently, she needs those items back, because one day she will have a little bundle in her arms that will love those precious items.

 

After a very long day, lots of emotions and excitement, we drove home, all of us dozing in the car. Well, except for Jeff, our driver. LOL And what trip out of town would be complete without a trip (or 4) to Walmart??? We made a quick stop (remember the Desitin that I had to toss?) and grab a few food items for the house. Then we finally made it to the house and settled in for the rest of the night. We were gonna need a good nights sleep, cause the next was was COURT!!!

 

To be continued......

6 months!

Oh my gracious, Buddy Boy is 6 months old!!! This has been the fastest six months of my life! Now that we have finally turned the corner on the sleep situation, I am actually remembering more of each passing day. Ha-ha I will be the first to admit, I totally and completely underestimated the whole sleep deprivation thing. I will also admit that it has been 100% totally and completely worth it. Even if I did go to work with mismatched socks/shoes, etc. I only fell asleep at my desk once, but thankfully I don’t think anyone noticed. Caleb continues to thrive and has the sweetest personality. We feel so blessed and often say “Not only were we chosen for a healthy baby, but he is so handsome AND so good and sweet!” He does love to be held but also loves to spend time in his various activities. He loves his exersaucer, Johnny jump up, and lately just rolling around on the floor with his toys. At his recent 6mo well-baby checkup the Doc was impressed by how well he is sitting up so straight. He had to show off his tricks: picking up small toys, passing them from one hand to the other, then to his mouth, holding items above his head, leaning forward while sitting to reach a toy and then sitting back up again without toppling over. He finally made it up to the 25% in weight!! Yay!!! And it did my Mommy heart good to hear her say that even though he is on the small side he is beyond his age developmentally. Tears started to sting my eyes, isn’t that silly? Oh, and by the way, I absolutely adore our pediatrician’s office. There are several doctors in the practice, and I love them all. They are so kind and patient and are great with the babies as well as Amber’s age. They never look at me funny when I have questions that probably sound stupid. They understood when I burst into tears when they sent us to the hospital when Caleb was 8 weeks old. And they all have shared in our joy over our adoption. If you are not 100% satisfied with your Pediatrician, find another one. Makes all the difference.

Jeff’s parents bought Caleb a Cars themed walker that has a honking horn, steering wheel, and turn signals that beep. Super cute and he loves it! He loves to lay down on the horn and then looks around and grins. He can not go forward in the walker yet, but he is good at going backwards across the floor. LOL I’m glad we don’t have carpet in our main living areas anymore; I think he will really be able to ZOOM across the floor soon! He also has a new trick, just this week. He rolls off the blanket onto the floor and then scoots backwards on his belly all the way across the room. Kind of like a reverse army crawl. It’s precious. He also saw his shadow for the first time last night when sitting on the floor in the living room. He slowly waved his hand around, and then tried to “scoop” up the shadow and eat it! hahaha I’m thankful I got it on film.

His six month birthday is also an important time in our adoption process. Finalization can not take place in TX until 6mo after our placement date. He was born on the 5^th of March; we received The Call on March 7^th, and we checked him out of hospital on March 8^th. So now that 6mo has passed our placement date we can now officially finalize in Texas. Of course, we have been waiting for this day for months, but the actually plane tickets and court date could not be set until they received our 5^th month post placement visit last month. But, everything is now set! Rental cars (2- cause all 7 of us and car seat won’t fit in one), rental house (Love VRBO.com), and plane tickets (OUCH!) Being the planner that I am, I also have a list of suggested restaurants and activities to do while we are there. I know we are going to Sea World and the Alamo, and if we have time I would love to visit the zoo. We will also be having family photos taken with my sweet friend Briana. So excited to see them again!! They recently shared some exciting news, but since she hasn’t written a blog post about it, I’m not going to say a thing......but I am so happy for them!! Anywhoo….. we will also get to spending some time with my sweet D. and her husband T. I miss her smiling face and even though we email and text regularly, I’m looking forward to hugging her neck. And I know she is looking forward to seeing our sweet baby and meeting the rest of the family!

 

Baby Boy we love you so very much! Thank you for letting me be your Mommy, it is the greatest feeling in the world.

 

 

5 months!!! (Yes, this post is really late!)

Caleb (aka Boudreau, Buddy, Bubby, Sunny boy, Hims) is 5 months old!!!!! He had another great month and is just growing and changing so much! He continues to be one happy little fella who just lights up a room. He has the sweetest, melt your heart smile that makes you want to cry and grin from ear to ear at the same time. He loves to laugh, cackle, listen to music, chew on ANYTHING, play on the floor, fly through the air, splash in the bath, pound the floor in his jump-up, eat baby food, drain a bottle, attack his feet, and pretty much excels at being adorable.

We had our LAST post placement visit this month too!! We have been so amazingly blessed with a caring Christian social worker, who didn't just do her job, but became a wonderful friend, motivator, encourager, and prayer warrior. She bent over backwards and pushed other things aside so she could concentrate on our final reports and get them done in record time. She communicated with our TX agency and was able to complete everything they needed so we could schedule a court date! We owe so much to our sweet Dawn! I'm very sad (selfishly) that she and her family have moved away in the last few days, but thankful they are still in the same state. And thankful that even though things were up in the air for her for a few months, God saw fit to keep her here for a little bit longer. I'm pretty sure HE knew I would need her! She does a wonderful work and I know she will continue to help many more families like ours.

Speaking of court date, we fly out of here on the 20th of Sept and finalize in court on the 21st!!! We are taking Amber with us as well as my Mom and Jeff's parents. So all 7 of us will be sharing in this experience. We have rented a house in San Antonio as well and we are really looking forward to doing some sight seeing too! We are also VERY excited about seeing our friend Briana and Noel (our amazing friends who housed us), and of course we have plans to see our sweet Danielle again!!!

Caleb has become quite the little busy guy this month! When you hold him, he stands, jumps, swings his arms, reaches for EVERYTHING, and can get quite mad if you take something away. LOL He has also started making more sounds, stringing sounds together. My fave is MAMAMAMAMAMAMAMAMAMA especially when accompanied by a sloppy grin. He is rolling around everywhere and is trying so hard to get his knees under him enough to inch forward. I am so not ready for him to learn how to crawl. :( He is doing great at sitting for about 15 minutes by himself. Especially if he has a toy in front of him to occupy his hands. AND, he can not sit in a shopping cart!! Yippeeee, that will make grocery shopping much easier for this Mama!

Little man had a great checkup this month, he is still on the petite side but Doc said he is still not concerned because he has grown about the same amount every month and he is on target if not ahead developmentally. So I'm not going to worry because he might just be a little fella. :) Good, maybe he will snuggle me longer!

So without further ado here are his 5 months stats and some yummy pics!

Weight - 14.9lbs

Length - 26in
Size 3 Diapers
Clothes - Mostly 3/6 mo, some 6mo

Food - LOVES baby food: Carrots, sweet potatoes, bananas, apples, peaches, not a huge fan of the green stuff though. And he is enjoying the mix of a couple with cherry bananas and strawberry/bananas being his fave.

Sleep - 2 naps a day ranging anywhere from 45min to 1.5hours. At night he sleeps from 9-1, eats 6-8oz, then sleep another 2 - 3 hours.

* I know most of you aren't interested in these little bits of info but this is my record of his accomplishments and I would like to print after a year, so bear with me :)

My precious baby boy, how you have changed my life for the good. I never imagined my life and heart would be so full. You are completely and wonderfully bonded with our little family. You adore his sister and laughs so hard at her antics. I absolutely swoon when you smile at me and lay your face on my chest. I love the way you still tuck a small hand in my shirt and like to play with the strands of hair around my ear, but only on the left side. I love the way you anticipate and appreciate all of the attention you receive, everywhere we go, especially church. I hope you know how wonderfully made you are and how much you are cherished and loved. Love you always sweet boy - Momma.

This one's for you MVH

Well, today we celebrated the 40th birthday of my dearest friend, cousin, and pseudo sister Vesta. (AKA Mary). And since I failed to give her a card today due to all the busyness, she gets a whole blog post dedicated just to her. :) I feel so sorry for anyone who has never met her or does not have a friend as great as her. Our relationship goes way beyond being first cousins. She is my best friend. I know, I know, you are are thinking that Jeff should be my best friend. And he is. But this is different. Vesta is my best friend/sister/partner in crime/therapist/encourager/confidant all rolled into one.

When I think of all we have been through together, all the things we have been through in our own lives, how much we have relied on each other through the years. I can't imagine a life without her in it. She is a wonderful daughter who loved and honored her parents and was loved and valued by her parents until they passed way too soon. But they left her with so much. She is courageous and strong. She received the kind heart, gentle spirit, and the ability to cook GOOD southern food. She can bake anything you can imagine and has the best lasagna, chicken n pastry, sausage balls, and pretty much everything she touches is amazing. From her Father she learned never to give up, keep fighting, and an impeccable work ethic that is unmatched. She will and does give her all in everything she signs up for. She has a problem telling people NO, but she still manages to get it all done.

We have been through all the years of dating. College graduation, more dating, engagements, weddings, and her babies being born. She was there when my Dad died. She "got" it. She understood. She told me it would be ok. We would survive this. That she was there for me. She understood when it was hard for me to show emotion, she knew that if it started, I feared it would never end.

She supported me through my divorce, was elated when Jeff and I met, rejoiced when I had an instant family with Amber, and was one of the biggest supporters of our adoption. For two years of holidays she helped me bake, bake, and bake some more. Hundreds of dozens of peanut butter balls were rolled, dipped, and prepared to sell. Over a hundred cheesecakes were lovingly made by hand and sold. All to raise money for our adoption. Many late nights spent in her kitchen. I think of her when I hold my son. And I tell him how many people love him and worked to help us bring him home. I tell him about his Aunt Vesta and how much she did for us, for him. I know he will love her the way I love her.

She has a great laugh. Especially when she gets really tickled over something. It is contagious. She is a wonderful teacher and has the talent and ability to teach high school students every day. I know she makes a difference in their lives. She is a natural. She is also really creative. We have a mutual love for Sonic drinks, office supplies - good writing pens, and fresh new notebooks. We love the beach and fondly remember riding home in her convertible after a long day at the beach. :) We have years of shared memories of the days we spent wondering how our lives would turn out. And lots of memories that are just ours. Of silly choices made, fun times, inside jokes, stupid boys, and the kind of secrets that you can only tell your best friend. Because you know she won't look at you funny and she will still be your best friend.

Anyway, I'm sure you get the gist of how wonderful she is. Here are a few pictures of us over the years. And if you don't have a friend like Vesta, go out and find you one, quick. Your life will be much better, fuller, happier, and have more meaning if you have a friend like her on your side.

Vesta's Birthday - 1979 That's me, the little person in the front. We were party animals way back then. LOL

Our infamous trip to Stone Mtn, NC. I still think you can see our hearts beating if you look closely! That was a big mountain!

Vesta's College Graduation

It was a great decision to skip my Senior Prom to go to this race. What a great time!

Hanging out in the kitchen even back then! Summer 1995

Fast forward a few year, marriages, and kids. Still looking good!

Love my Sis

Holding down the fort on our yearly gate duty at EXCITE. We have always made a great team!

Just an update

Just wanted to check in, I feel like I have neglected this little blog lately. We are quickly approaching 4^th months of Caleb being home and most nights I faceplant into the bed with a promise to write a blog post tomorrow. But then the next day comes and I still haven’t made the time to write. Caleb is changing and growing so fast it blows my mind. I have always heard people say that kids grow up so fast and I have witnessed it with Amber over the last 6 years but sometimes I think I can actually see Caleb changing from one day to the next. Every morning I ask him “Did you grow last night?” He just grins and kicks his little chubby legs. Oh my, what a sweet baby boy we do have! We are all enjoying how he recognizes us; he really knows how to make you feel special!

I also thought I would answer a few questions that we are often asked:

1. Is Caleb’s adoption process over? Mostly. Our agency requires us to have a post placement visit in our home with our social worker, Dawn every month for 6 months. After the 5^th month home visit our TX social worker will contact the agency attorney and we will be able to schedule our court date and finalization which can take place any Friday after he reaches six months, which will be in September. The whole heehaw gang (Jeff, Amber, Caleb, myself, my Mom, and Jeff’s parents) are all traveling to TX for a long weekend to have our special day in court! So looking forward to this time!!! We will then be able to order his social security card and birth certificate! Yay, then I can open him a bank account!! Yippee

2. Do you have contact with Caleb’s birth parents? No, we have not had any contact with them. They requested the adoption be closed. The agency requires that we send pics and an update to them monthly for the first six months (then 2x a year). The pics and monthly birthmom letter that we write are held at their office in case S. wanted them. But as of last week, she has yet to pick up the pictures or letters. At first this made me sad because I thought she might want to see them. But then I thought about my own feelings if I was in her situation. It might would just be too hard to see pictures of him. We do know that Caleb’s birth parents are no longer together and that their other children remain with grandparents. We also know that the birth mom is still very confident in her decision and has no regrets with placing him for adoption. We continue to pray for them.

3. “Will you do this again?” If they are asking if we will adopt again, the answer is possibly. If they are meaning adopting a newborn specifically, the answer is who knows????. LOL Cause let’s face it; we are not getting any younger! I would never ever change a single second of the time we have had thus far with Caleb, but I also seriously underestimated exactly how exhausted I would be. I don’t like to complain because I really don’t want to hear “You asked for this, blah blah blah”. I was doing pretty good until it was time for me to return to work. Now the evenings are a whirlwind and I know they will only get worse when school is back in. I am balancing the desire to cuddle on the couch with baby boy all evening with the need to do other necessities, you know, like feed my family. I am balancing the need to feed my family with the want to play games and crafts with Amber. Let’s not even discuss laundry. Or grocery shopping. Grocery shopping takes time, precious time away from my little family. There is just not enough time in the evening to accomplish everything I desire, want, need to do. So we eat easy meals, use bath towels more than once to cut down on laundry, and spread crafts and board games over several nights. Yes, I realize this was a very long answer to Question #3, but I digress.

4. "How is Amber?" She is over the moon, totally, completely in love with Caleb. And he feels the same way about her! He laughs, smiles, and drools every time she approaches him, it is too sweet! She is such a great help too! She loves to feed him, lay on the floor and play, pick out his clothes, and even changes wet diapers too. She likes to carry the diaper bag which is really helpful! She is amazing at calming him down in while we are in the car. He has definitely gotten much better about riding in the car seat but we still occasionally need intervention from Big Sissy while they are in the backseat. She tells me frequently that she is so glad that he is home with us. I love our big girl and she has made a great Big Sister!

5. "How is D., our first birth mom?" D. is doing really well. We still talk, email, text regularly and I am so thankful for that friendship. I don’t know why, but people are often so surprised to hear that we still communicate? Why is that? Perhaps people have a misconception that she was the reason our first match fell through. Well, I wish I could set all of those people straight! She had no control over that situation and did her very best to keep us She had no control over that situation and did her very best to keep us involved and informed. We truly want the best for her and look forward to a very long friendship. We also look forward to seeing her and her hubby in just a few months when we return to TX! Can’t wait!!!!

Well, I did it! I managed to update the blog!!!!! Yay!!! Of course, everyone else is asleep now, as I should be.......

3 Months!!!

My precious Caleb is 3 months old!!! May was a really busy month! What am I saying?? The last three months have been busy and I don't see it slowing down any time soon. Tomorrow will be one week since I started back to work after 12 weeks home with Caleb. The first day was bad, really bad. I held it together when I left, and did ok at work when around my co-workers. It was the quiet times during the day that it hit me. I don't get to see his smiling face all day long. I don't get to hear him "talking" to me when we play. I know that is selfish, and 12 weeks home is way more time that many new parents have. It was tough at times but I would not trade that time we had together for anything. And Caleb knew when I went back to work. The first two days he cried, often. And this is not very common for my easy going little fella. My Aunt is coming to my house and caring for him, which is another blessing. I like being able to come home on my lunch and call home as many times as I want to. And I am pretty sure my Mom likes being able to stop over after work anytime she wants to get her baby love. I also felt feel really guilty for leaving him. And VERY protective and particular. Would she know how he likes his bottle? Would she know that sometimes he just likes to swing and be left alone? That he doesn't really like his pacifier unless he is sleepy, facing the crook of your arm and in a snug hold? That he will tolerate tummy time for a bit but only if it is on his terms? I have relayed all of these things to his sitter, but still felt like no one could care for him like me. I don't know if that makes me crazy or not. But anyway, every day back at work is getting easier and he seems to be transitioning just fine now. So without further ado here are his 3mo stats and a few pictures!

12 lb 9oz 23 inches long

Size 2 diapers

Size 3mo clothes

Eats 3-4 oz ever 2-3 hours

Consistently sleeps from 8:30 – 1:30, then every 2 -3 hours

Several quick naps during the day

Can sit in the bumbo - which he LOVES!

Sits in the exersaucer with a towel cushion

Still enjoys bath time

Laughs, coos, squeals

Drools & blows lots of bubbles

Tolerates the car seat better now that the head support is out (YAY!)

Enjoys tummy time now that he can rest on the back of the nap nappy

Loves his sissy and loves for her to read to him

Still enjoying his swing :)

My sweet precious boy, your personality has really started to shine this month. The thought of your wide grin and twinkling eyes gets me through the work day. I can hardly get home quick enough, in a hurry to hold you close to me. You are such a joy to be around and I’m pretty sure you are loving all the attention you receive everywhere we go. I’m so glad you reward others with a beautiful smile when they speak to you. I know it melts their hearts also. I love how you hear my voice and search the room for me. Makes me feel like the most important person. I love your super messy crazy hair when you wake up. I love when you are drinking your bottle, making eye contact and you stop drinking…..to smile around the bottle at me, even though it makes milk run everywhere. I love how you tuck a small hand in the neck of my shirt when I’m rocking you to sleep. I love how you react when I hold you so that you can stand up on me. You are so excited and so proud of yourself like you are the king of the world. I love that you LOVE songs even when they are coming out of my mouth. There are so many things we look forward to doing with you, watching you learn and grow. We love you baby boy and I give thanks every day that you are my son.

Deliciousness

Resting in Grandma's Arms

My first attempt at Bumbo sitting, he can not sit without any blanket assistance.

Spending time with Uncle Kevin

Mother's Day

Surfing!

Look what I can do!!!!